How To Move Past Your Negative Triggers
Do you ever have things happen that trigger an intense feeling? Maybe someone says a word or phrase that triggers something that makes you feel like your heart just dropped 20 feet?
The feeling could be anything from reminding you how bad your day was yesterday to reminding you that you have over $11,000 in credit card debt to reminding you of a close one’s death.
The bad news is that we can’t directly control our feelings that arise from these triggers. No matter how hard we try in the moment, we cannot change how we feel.
It’s too hard. It just doesn’t happen.
However, we can control our thoughts around the trigger or the situation so that we can view it in a different way. When we change our thoughts around the trigger, we indirectly change our feelings around it. We can control and choose our mindset over that thing so that we don’t have issues when it arises.
How do you feel about that situation whatever it is? How could you view it differently to give you a sense of peace and contentment? How could you use that situation to grow as a person and use it to be a better human being? How can you use that experience to help others?
I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and when you are in that mindset you are living in abundance. You are able to use every experience to your benefit and for the benefit of others. Instead of the universe being out to get you, the universe is here for you to teach you and aid you in growth.
Live from abundance. Know that you can change your thoughts around ANY situation so you don’t get bombarded with triggers on the daily. Use your intense experiences for good.
Here's how to move past your negative triggers:
1. Accept responsibility for your reactions. Understand that you are the one giving meaning to things that come up in your life.
2. Recognize when you are having an emotional reaction to a trigger.
3. Identify what the emotion is. Anger, resentment, stress, sadness, etc.
4. Figure out what triggered the emotion. The news of your mother-in-law coming to town, a call from a collections agency, your best friend announcing she's pregnant and you're nowhere close to marriage?
5. Get real with yourself on the connection between the trigger and your emotion. Be honest about how it makes you truly feel. Get specific.
6. Think about how you actually WANT to feel about the trigger. If you're struggling to find the silver lining of the situation, think about how nice it would be to care a little less about the mean comments your mother-in-law makes and just enjoy the good moments, or how much you're going to grow as a person for overcoming your obstacle of paying off your credit card debt, or that the sad reminder about your grandmother's death is actually a nice reminder of the wonderful life she had. It's important to decide this ahead of time so when it comes up again, you've already decided how you think and feel about it.
7. When it happens again, remember step 6. Relax, breathe, detach from your current thoughts and feelings, center yourself, and think your new thoughts and feel your new feelings.
Note: If your negative triggers are food related, this still works. In some cases, it may be best to remove or avoid the trigger all together but in the instance that it does still come up, you'll want to have done the work above so you don't have any issues.